Junk Food Nation, maybe it’s that I’m not fully awake, or maybe I’m just a curmudgeon generally – but if I have to see ONE MORE GODDAMN FLASH MOB I’M GONNA PUKE.  ….sigh, let me back up.

There once was a time when I was actually LOVED flash mobs.  “How did they organize this?” I thought. I’m talking 2002-ish here.  But honestly, back then I was an easy sell – I was amazed when you could get FIVE people doing the same thing at the same time (N*SYNC, anyone?)  So getting 100+ people all in one place to do a coordinated dance routine?  WOW.  Bravo, people. Bravo.

But now?  It all feels so contrived.  I’ve seen, on more than one occasion, fliers on the street organizing upcoming flash mobs. I’ve received emails organizing them.  People doing Gangnam Style flash mobs in their college student center, people doing Harlem Shake flash mobs in malls, flash mobs in city centers, parking lots, inside stores.  People proposing to their spouses via flash mob, people blocking traffic doing flash mobs, people blocking traffic because they are recording these flash mobs on their phones.  STOP ALREADY. I’m sick of it.

The funny thing is, I cannot really put my finger on why. The wonderment of it all is dispelled when I see a Facebook group set up to coordinate a flash mob with 10,000 people invited.  Am I just a grump? Today, I saw all over Facebook some flash-mob-performance of One Day More from Les Miserables. I liked that musical. And I’m sure that the flash-mob-performance was good. BUT I JUST DON’T CARE.

What about you, Junk Food Nation?  Thumbs up, thumbs down on flash mobs? Have you ever been part of one?  Have you seen one live? I want to know your opinions – tell me in the comments below.

Today’s junk food: Caramel Apple Twizzlers!

Caramel Apple Twizzlers

Caramel Apple Twizzlers! Because, of course. Some people are Red Vines people, some are Twizzler people. Whenever these people meet on the street, they fight… and let me tell you, getting whipped by a Red Vine hurts like a dickens.

With all the fall flavors coming out, Twizzlers needed to get into the game. Here is their offering – Caramel Apple Twizzlers.

Caramel Apple Twizzlers: Leaves!

Twizzlers has already taken the form of various other fruit flavors, so why not an apple flavor?  I mean, it’s not they’re making pumpkin spice Twizzlers, amirite? (Oh God – please do not make pumpkin spice Twizzlers, guys. Seriously.)

Caramel Apple Twizzlers: WHAT THE

To make Caramel Apple Twizzlers more…well, caramel apple-like, they filled the amazingly green chewy candy with caramel. It’s obvious in design, and because of that, sort of genius. “Should we make the Twizzler caramel flavored?” “No, Bob, let’s put the caramel INSIDE the Twizzler.” “Holy Sh*t.”

Caramel Apple Twizzlers: 50+ cal per Twizzler

Caramel Apple Twizzlers: Lotsa sugah

Do you really want to know what is inside Caramel Apple Twizzlers? Me neither.

Caramel Apple Twizzlers: SO GREEN

When I opened these Caramel Apple Twizzlers, the smell of apple was strong – very candy like, like when you smell an apple Blow Pop or Jolly Rancher, for example.  Strong smell, creepy look. But what about the taste?

Caramel Apple Twizzlers: EPIC GREEN

When I first bit into one of these Caramel Apple Twizzlers, I definitely got an apple taste.  Well, sort of.  You know how people say regular Twizzlers are “strawberry flavored,” and you eat a Twizzler and think, “Yeah… I *guess* this is strawberry.”  That’s the type of apple flavor this was. I GUESS this was apple flavor. It was sort of muted, like how Twizzlers taste generally. It was more apple flavored than NOT apple flavored, I’ll give it that.  Texture was good – soft and chewy, just like I like from a Twizzler.

Inside the Twizzler was a soft caramel gooey filling that provided decent sugary caramel flavor. Sort of sugary/gritty. Combined with the outer semi-apple-flavored skin, the caramel definitely overtook the apple flavor.  The bite of apple flavor came in and out.  Did this taste like a caramel apple? Not quite, but it was the closest these Twizzlers could get. I think if the outer apple flavor had been more sour, these would’ve been a knockout.

Still, as they were – I sort of liked them.  Actually, as I ate them, I realized I liked them a lot!  Mainly, the texture was so easy to chew and the flavor was sugary so it wasn’t hard to consume. If you’re a Twizzler fan, you’ll like these.  Of the fall-flavored items I’ve seen, I thought this would be low on the totem pole, but these were definitely better than average and better than I expected.

PURCHASED AT: Target, Germantown, MD.

COST: $1.00

Thoughts? Please comment below or hit me up on Twitter @junkfoodguy or LIKE my Facebook Page and message me there. I also have Google+!! Let’s hang out.

Sincerely,

Junk Food Guy