*NERD ALERT*

JUNK FOOD NATION JUNK FOOD NATION!!!!   I DID IT!  I FINALLY WON MY HIGH SCHOOL FANTASY BASEBALL LEAGUE!

Ok, let me back up my fantasy baseball geekdom up for a second.  First, those who read this blog know I love baseball.  LOVE IT.  I’ll be watching the AL Tiebreaker game tonight between Tampa Bay and Texas (Texas takes it, btw).  I’ll be watching every single night of playoffs from here on out. I’m heading to Vegas at the end of this month where I hope to bet on some World Series games.  October is tied as one of my FAVORITE months, and much of it is because of Postseason Baseball.

Second, I LOVE fantasy baseball.  I love that it’s complicated and requires a long long season of dedication. Around the nation, TODAY, THOUSANDS of fantasy baseball leagues have wrapped up and commissioners are writing emails doling out prizes, etc. I play in three leagues: (1) Clout Wars, with an assembled bunch of owners from my college, law school, and work circles. (2) My RotoAuthority League, where I’ve dueled fantasy guru Tim Dierkes for the past two years. And (3) a high school keeper H2H league that I’ve played for the past fifteen years.  Let me say that again: FIFTEEN YEARS. Fifteen years is longer than I’ve dated the Junk Food Gal.  My car isn’t fifteen years old.  I haven’t held a JOB for more than 2-3 years at a time, but I’ve played with the same group of guys from high school for FIFTEEN FRIGGIN YEARS.

And here’s the thing: I’ve never won. Never.  NEVER EVER EVER EVER.  Year in year out, I’ve put my $100 cash into this damn league, and made it to the finals five or six times – and I’ve NEVER WON.  Ugh, it was always SOMETHING.  Pitchers getting hurt last minute.  Bats going cold. Just general mismanagement on my part, or lack of personnel.  Plus, the guys in my league KNEW baseball – it was never easy.

But this year, FINALLY, a first: my team, which has been named the Asian Invasion for the entire time I’ve managed them (yeah, its offensive), finally brings home the trophy.  First you get the money. Then you get the power. Then you get the women.  Or in this case, a big ass trophy with a metal glove on top.  Woot.

Today’s junk food: Russell Stover Caramel Apple Big Bites!

Russell Stover Caramel Apple Big Bites: The Money Shots

I reviewed Russell Stover’s S’mores Big Bites back in the day, and loved those.  Now, for the Halloween season (presumably), Russell Stover candy company is BACK – this time, with Caramel Apple Big Bites.  Hooooooooooooooooo-kay.

In looking at the packaging, these appear to be a big hunk of confection.  Just from the wrapping paper, it looks like chocolate that has been shaped into an “apple” shape, filled with caramel, and in one situation, covered in nuts.  Where’s the apple? I shudder to ask.

So let’s taste!  First, let’s sink our teeth into the Russell Stover Caramel Apple Big Bite:

Russell Stover Caramel Apple Big Bites: The Money Shot

Russell Stover Caramel Apple Big Bites: NATURAL APPLE FLAVOR

Russell Stover Caramel Apple Big Bites: Apple shape, stripped with darker color chocolate

Russell Stover Caramel Apple Big Bites: Caramel gooey inside

I took a bite of this Russell Stover Caramel Apple Big Bite, and my teeth sank softly through the whole thing.  The outer chocolate layer was semi thick, but because of all the oils, bit away easily.  The inside was a THICK layer of caramel, VERY thick, and very soft.  The type where as you pull your mouth away, threads of caramel come streaming behind.  But again, because of all the oils, bit off easily.

The taste? Honestly – chocolate and caramel.  That’s it.  That’s all the Junk Food Gal tasted too.  We tried and TRIED to taste the apple, and I *thought* I tasted it, but wasn’t sure.  Maybe in the aftertaste there was some tang, but not enough to evoke apple.  Ugh, these were pretty disappointing.  PASS.

Let’s turn to the Russell Stover Caramel Apple with Peanuts Big Bite…

Russell Stover Caramel Apple with Peanuts Big Bites: The Money Shot

Russell Stover Caramel Apple with Peanuts Big Bites: 320 calories per candy.  WOW.

Russell Stover Caramel Apple with Peanuts Big Bites: That’s…pretty encrusted with peanuts.

Russell Stover Caramel Apple with Peanuts Big Bites: Same soft interior.

When I bit into this Russell Stover Caramel Apple with Peanuts Big Bite, I felt like this tasted better than the non-peanut version…sorry, people with peanut allergies!  Of course, the non-peanut version is probably made somewhere peanuts are used so…yeah.  The chocolate and caramel was the same as the other, but there were a few added elements which made this one taste more…well…caramel apple-like.

First, there was a better taste of that citrus-y flavor that you get when you bite into a green apple.  That short immediate burst of sour…I could taste that in the chocolate with this candy.  The addition of peanuts also helped, because coupled with that bit of tang, it reminded me of the flavor and taste of caramel apples.  Add in the caramel, and the flavor profile is there.

Now, did this taste EXACTLY like a caramel apple? Nope. I mean, I don’t know about you, but I haven’t eaten many caramel apples that also had chocolate.  But was the flavor profile enough where I could MAYBE be reminded of caramel apple? Yes.

I probably wouldn’t buy EITHER of these again, but if I were to, I’d go for the peanut one.

PURCHASED AT: Walgreens

COST: $1.00 each

Thoughts? Please comment below or hit me up on Twitter @junkfoodguy or LIKE my Facebook Page and message me there. Let’s hang out.

Sincerely,

Junk Food Guy