Junk Food Nation, I root for Tiger Woods.  As I type this blog post, the Open Championship is on in the background, and Tiger has just teed off.  And I am rooting hard for him to win this Major.

But why? I have tons of friends who hate Tiger for being a jerk, being a womanizer, for lying and cheating. And that’s fine – I don’t begrudge them that.  There was a time when I was the same way – I felt that if you were a bad person in real life, I would root hard against you.  Comeuppance, as it were. The problem I eventually faced, however, was that I started realizing that ALL of the stars I rooted had flaws…and was it my place to judge whose flaws were worse than others? For example, I rooted for Clemens when he was on the Yankees despite being, in my mind, a federal criminal. I rooted for Jordan back in the day despite the fact that he was horrible to people, a gambler, and unfaithful. I rooted for Dwight Gooden, Darryl Strawberry, and a lot of those Mets way back when despite consistent drug use and setting a poor moral example.

I was finding it very inconsistent that I was passing judgment on some stars but not others.  I realize that every fan can do whatever they want with their fandom. But how could *I* justify rooting for one player over another player when they were both, for example, drunk drivers. I realized I wanted more consistency.  So, I decided: I would shake my head about what happened in people’s personal lives, but when it came to their talent, I would not let their personal lives get in the way of my fandom decisions.

I don’t root for stars who think they are better than what they are – looking at you, Stephon Marbury. I don’t root for stars who take their talent for granted and do careless things on the field – looking at you, Desean Jackson. And I don’t root for stars who just do stupid things which are clearly detrimental to their game – Jay Williams and his motorcycle.

Tiger Woods may be a completely despicable human being, but he’s extremely talented and I like what he’s done for the game of golf.  Love him or hate him, people watch golf when he’s in the hunt on Sunday. He had a rough two year stretch and worked hard to get back to where he is. I respect his role as a golfer, even if I don’t respect him as a person.

As such, when he’s on, I pull hard for him to win. Once he’s off the links, he disappears from my thoughts.

Today’s junk food: Fla-Vor-Ice Hershey’s Fudge Pops!

Fla-Vor-Ice Hershey’s Fudge Pops: The Money Shot

Fla-Vor-Ice Hershey’s Fudge Pops were found at my local Walgreens.  The sign said, “$2.59 for 1, 2 for $5.00.” Oh really??? Don’t do me any favors, Walgreens, saving me that whopping 18 cents!!!

I’ve reviewed Freezer Pops before on this blog – to some, Otter Pops. Usually, these frozen stick-like ice pops are a fruit flavor of some sort. So when I saw these were chocolate based, I was VERY intrigued.

Ripply fudge stream

I like the look of the box of these Fla-Vor-Ice Hershey’s Fudge Pops – it makes sense.  If you’re gonna say they are fudge pops, you NEED an image of rich flowing fudge.  You wanna imagine that fudge pouring into your mouth like Augustus Gloop.

Hershey’s endorsed – like it

Fla-Vor-Ice Hershey’s Fudge Pops are made with real Hershey’s cocoa.  Nice – good to know these don’t just have a bunch of corn syrup in them….

60 calories sounds like a plan

…HEY WHAT THE HELL!  THE SECOND INGREDIENT IS CORN SYRUP.  Lies! LIES I TELL YOU!

THANKS FOR THE DIRECTIONS

Fla-Vor-Ice Hershey’s Fudge Pops, are these directions necessary? Didn’t the front of the box already say Freeze & Eat? What more explanation do you need?  These aren’t freezer pops for MENSA…

Sort of looks like poo

Well…that’s interesting looking.  I should’ve known these Fla-Vor-Ice Hershey’s Fudge Pops would look…funky.

So…brown

Fla-Vor-Ice Hershey’s Fudge Pops have the standard format of most freezer pops – long clear plastic tubes that when frozen still provide enough of an edge to cause a papercut if you grip it wrong.

Frozen bite mark

I took a bite of one of these Fla-Vor-Ice Hershey’s Fudge Pops, and let it dissolve / swallowed.  Hmmmm…. not. Great.  Let me explain.  At first, the cocoa flavor was nice and strong –  a cool frozen chocolate taste.  I thought this might resemble the frozen hot chocolate flavors from Serendipity 3. But then the corn syrup syrupy-sweetness smacked me in the face and took the cocoa flavor OVER THE TOP into gross-ville. Nooooo.

Moreover, there was no real milky flavor involved.  Had there been more of a creamy component, I could’ve imagined these tasting like Jello Pudding Pops… but there wasn’t. It was just sickly sweet syrupy chocolate flavor in icey form. It was like frozen Yoo-Hoo.  Which I also don’t love.

Anyways, my recommendation would be to pass on these.  Sorry Fla-Vor-Ice.

PURCHASED AT: Walgreens

COST: $2.59

Thoughts? Please comment below (I always reply) or hit me up on Twitter @junkfoodguy or LIKE my Facebook Page and message me there. Also, you can always email me at junkfoodguy@junkfoodguy.com. Let’s hang out.

Sincerely,

Junk Food Guy