Junk Food Nation, I know on Mondays I usually write a post about awkwardness, but I’m going to have to postpone that until tomorrow.  No, today, I have to start off this post by saying, ahem: <ready Chris Berman voice> NO ONE CIRCLES THE WAGONS LIKE THE BUFFALO BILLS! (And you’re with me, Leather.) </annoying Chris Berman>

See Junk Food Nation? Past sports head to head matchup records mean nothing.  The Pats were favored in yesterday’s matchup and they played extremely well. But as anyone will tell you, any team can beat any other team any given Sunday.  The past 15 matchups between New England and Buffalo didn’t matter when the game was over at 4:25pm EST yesterday.

Go Harvard

Instead, September 25, 2011 will mark the day a Harvard quarterback beat the New England Patriots. Am I predicting playoffs? Nope. Will New England, pissed beyond belief, blow through twelve straight opponents until they can met the Bills again in Week 17? Probably. But for now, my home team is 3-0. And all I can feel is…”finally.”

Asian Junk Food Alert! Nong Shim Octopus Flavored Tako Chips!

The Money Shot

From the same folks who brought you the favorite Kikiriki Chicken Drumstick Snacks, Nong Shim now presents Octopus Chips!  Of course you do, you crazy Asian junk food company.

I’ve had some crazy tasting chips in the past, including prawn chips – but octopus flavored chips?? NOW we’re talking bat-shit crazy.

Scribble scribble

Tako chips are apparently…well, you know what? I Googled and found NOTHING. So I have no IDEA what Tako chips are. On Nong Shim’s website the company describes this junk food as: “Round & cute octopus-shaped (joyful to the eye); tasty & salty; and smell of octopus.”

God, even the description is so very Asian.

Like goldfish -- but not

The bag shows chips that kinda look like ridged Goldfish crackers… I guess if you look at the “legs” and how they’re separated, it kind of looks like octopi.  Why the cartoon octopus is wearing snorkeling gear makes no sense, but that’s besides the point.

Thank god for the red radish powder

Ingredient time!  Octopus flavor and red radish powder. MMMMMMMMMM YUMMY. Excuse me, I’d like to know what is IN that octopus flavoring.  How is that made, exactly?  Chemically? Or did they pulverize dried octopus and mix it in with the batter.  Inquiring minds want to know!

Yeah, I have to look this one up

Yellow Corvina = a small fish also known as a redlip croaker, or small yellow croaker. This product contains a mix of fish, milk, wheat…I’m a little queasy now.

It's like a combination of Bugles, Goldfish, and...calamari?

Creepy

Opening the bag, these chips were definitely cute 🙂 They indeed looked like Goldfish crackers that were slightly warped and ridged.  They had a flaky and styrofoamy consistency, not unless i cheese puff or cheese curl.  The smell emanating from the bag reminded me of octopus from a Chinese restaurant, salt, and soy.

Crisp and fishy

I popped a few in my mouth and crunched – whoa, weird.  These chips start out with an initial salty miso-like taste that quickly morphs into a very fishy, octopus flavor. I had to pop a few more to make sure my taste buds weren’t deceiving me, but the octopus flavor was very strong, ending with just a tiny bit of sweetness.

Anyone who’s had octopus sauteed from a Chinese restaurant will know exactly how this tastes.  And I have to admit, as uncertain as I was, these chips were slightly addicting. Nong Shim, you’ve done it again.

Sincerely, Junk Food Guy