Junk Food Nation, it should be no shock to you that I always have plenty of things to review for this blog. Whether it be things I find or things you all have suggested, there is no shortage or delicious (or disappointing) snacks, goodies, treats, yum yums, nom noms, and more. My trips to the grocery or to Target or to Walmart are exciting for me – after I’ve finished getting what I really need, I then get to stroll down Junk Food Lane, looking for my next creative morsel.

But here’s what annoys me to no end – when I stumble upon something I THINK is new, different, promotional, limited edition – only to find it’s not anything different or rare at all!  Example #1:

Oreos dressed as....Oreos

Halloween Oreos!  I saw this display and was so excited. Is the creme pumpkin spice or maybe some sort of caramel corn flavor?  Bright orange creme frosting HAS to be good, right?

Apparently, Halloween Oreos have orange colored creme (ooooo) and they have five-six different Halloween images stenciled on the chocolate cookie.  Yep. That’s. It.

Now why why why would you make these?  Is it really just to make a buck, Oreos? I mean, I understand Halloween is a big cash cow, and you’re trying to hook the mom whose kids are screaming that they NEED Oreos with orange creme inside to celebrate the spooky day, but cmon.  AT LEAST change up the flavor, add a different cookie flavor, do SOMETHING.  This is just an Oreo with a little food coloring.

Don’t even get me started on these that I saw a month ago (example #2):

Are you ready for some...Oreos.

New football shape! Same great taste!  ———– um, no. Lame. I feel like with the new shape, you’re giving me less Oreos, too, so double lame.

It’s even worse when there’s no noticeable change to the product itself, and the difference is JUST the packaging.  Case in point #3:

Pringles can be nerdy too

I’m guessing that because the entire Star Wars series is being released on Blu-Ray, Pringles is helping with a promotion – there’s Skywalker Sour Cream and Onion, Boba Fett BBQ, Han Solo Salt and Vinegar, Chewbacca Cheddar Cheese, Princess Leia Pizza, and Darth Vader Original.  (Darth Vader ORIGINAL??? You’re not going to even TRY ANY alliteration??? Weak, Pringles.)

There are no new flavors here.  These are not the chips you’re looking for. There’s no colorful shapes, no stenciled Wookie imagery in the chips themselves. There’s no lightsabers springing out of the cans when you pop them.  These are the same damn flavors we had before, just with a little more ink on the outside.

And anyone who is just “collecting” these Pringles cans, preserving them unopened for another fifty years so you can proudly display them, I say this to you: You’re gonna have some nasty potato dust in there, weirdo.

So please, junk food companies – I know these promotions make a buck, but if you’re gonna do something new, MAKE IT NEW.  Thank you.

Sincerely, Junk Food Guy