Junk Food Nation,

Today is another edition of things I am looking for to try and review.  A friend linked me to this foreign brand of Doritos, shown below: Sesame Chicken Doritos!  I love sesame chicken, General Tso/Chao/Tsao’s chicken, orange chicken as much as the next guy.  Take any low grade chicken pieces, douse them in breading, deep fry them, and then cover them with a sweet spicy gelatinous sauce and I’m happier than …well, I can’t think of anything clever.  I’d be pretty damn happy, let me just say that.

The Money Shot

Frito-Lay apparently loves to get all crazy with the flavors in other countries. And I tell you what, I’m jealous. When I saw this bag of Sesame Chicken Doritos, I knew I had to have it!  But when is the next time I’ll be visiting Japan??  Hell – when have I EVER visited Japan?

One day I’ll visit a bunch of these Asian countries and come back with hundreds of tiny bags of wacko junk foods.  Until then, I just have to sigh and imagine the answers to such questions as: What is Doritos Gorumet? Why is there a beer glass on my bag of chips? Are these meant to be eaten as a meal, with a nice glass of suds nearby? Are these high brow Doritos? And when have I ever seen sesame chicken served on a bed of lettuce, and not just slopped into a black plastic circular container?

Finally, I’ll leave you with one thought.  Do consumers from other countries look at OUR flavors of chips and nuts and crackers and think to themselves, “Yuck, what were they thinking?” Do they think our Buffalo Wing Pringles, our Rosemary Triscuits, our Taco Doritos, our Chocolate Cheesecake yogurt, our ice cream with chocolate covered potato chips, our Peanut Butter and Jelly in the same jar — all of it, do they think we are just as weird as they are?  Hmmmm.

Sincerely, Junk Food Guy